M. Author

7 Most Elaborate Hoaxes in Kenya’s History

 I’ve only been conned once. By an old man. An old senile man. Not 60s old, older, that guy was really really old. By the time I realized I was the sucker in the transaction, he was probably on his deathbed, dying of natural causes.

7 Survival Stories from Horrific Kenyan Aircraft Crashes

Aircraft accidents are the Grim Reapers buffet. But sometimes some people just refuse to die, some of them dont just stare down death in the face and wag a finger at it, they also swim for miles or feed their infants whisky.

When Uganda and Zambia had Space Programs

Yes. The answer to your question is yes, both Uganda and Zambia once had space programs. As have hundreds of other countries, you rebut? Well, the Zambian and Ugandan programs hold the cake for nongiveafuckery, something whose primary symptom is well, not letting obvious weakness stop one from dreaming.  Uganda Of course it was Idi …

7 Most Eccentric Kenyan Politicians

The thin line between eccentricity and insanity is riddled with money, and power, and political office, all of which Kenyan politicians have. In fact, if you the common Wanjiku were to try some of the eccentricities here, there would be a ‘Get Wanjiku to Mathari Hospital Campaign.’

7 Most Elaborate Cons ever pulled off in Kenya by Foreigners

The great gonzo journalist Hunter S Thompson once said, “In a closed society where everybody’s guilty, the only crime is getting caught.In a world of thieves, the only final sin is stupidity.” Wanjiku, the taxpayer who watches soap operas every evening and takes the 9 O’clock news for truth, expects elected leaders and the media …

Why We Should Save Kisite-Mpunguti Marine Park

If you have 1.3 billion shillings and an interest in the hospitality industry, you can buy prime undeveloped land in the heart of a marine national park, a national reserve listed as a protected site. A Mr. Alessandro Torriani placed an ad offering 53.00 Acres of undeveloped prime land in the Kisite-Mpunguti Marine National Park …

Going Bananas: Making a Case for a National Fruit

“Dawa ya Mende! Ya Panya! Ya Mende! Ya Panya! Cockroach Murderer! Cockroach Killer! Ya Mende! Ya Panya! Ua Mende! Ua Panya!” the man standing outside Muthurwa market screams all day. Unlike his colleagues in the business who have acquire a small public address system and then recorded themselves so they can just stand there as …

7 Most Badass Kenyan Gangsters

Kenyan gangsters are the stuff of legend. Their exploits often follow a Robinhood-style trajectory, with gangsters working as ‘wealth distributors.’ Once in a while, they even make citizen arrests.

The Barmaid and the Boy who Kissed an Inexperienced Bed

To the creative writer, there is something morbidly inspiring about morgues and barstools. Morgues because dead men tell no tales, as the saying goes, and the man looking for inspiration wants to tell tales. Barstools because, well, just barstools.